Hello,

I asked an old boss to do me a favor. I left on good terms and we talked and laughed for awhile. He said no to my favor - which was the right answer. I asked him to cross a slippery slope and he didn't fall for it.

At an AA meeting I shared and at the meeting-after-the-meeting someone said a saying I hadn't heard in a long time:

'The truth will set you free - but first it will piss you off'.

Yes. Knowing something is right doesn't mean I have to be happy about it. I'm not. But I have to take my actions and let go of the results.

So today's book is the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, pg. 449., ...acceptance....

That's today's book/situation. Any thoughts?

I just celebrated a double digit anniversary in AA. (ODAT). I introduced myself to a woman I never saw before at a meeting, a potential interim sponsee, Monday.

(WARNING - Long story): I told her I would be celebrating at a group anniversary Tuesday and would she come and hear me speak. (I think it's nice for sponsees to hear sponsors speak/vice versa). She said 'I'd love to hear you, but it conflicts with my schedule'. I asked her if she was working and she told me she would be at another meeting EXACTLY when I would be speaking. (eh la). My gut told me to cut to the chase and said 'so, you don't want to hear me speak?' She said, 'that's not it, but it conflicts with my schedule'. (Again). I said, okay, see ya later and hung up.

I know the BB meeting she was at was exceptional but I feel that she could have shown willingness by showing up at my meeting that one time. When I introduced myself to her Monday she panted, 'could I have your number?' Then she not-so-politely interrogated my sponsor credentials. (including my age when I got sober - OUCH!) Good questions, the right questions, but no boundaries.

So - am I wrong for having a resentment? Or did I save time? Rejection hurts, even when it's probably for the best.

Yup - the group anniversary was great, with lots of people I've known for years, many who saw me count days. It was special and we all told stories and laughed so hard the chairs shook.

I was worried about unemployment ending after taking some early actions of calls/searches and reaching dead ends. So I decided to take a short walk around the block.

I saw the nicest thing; a bag of books in front of a brownstone, mostly hardcovers, with a handwritten note on top: 'Please give us a new home'. What a kind thought; you know a really nice person wrote that. It made me smile. I searched through the six or seven books...mostly textbooks and mysteries I had read. Then I found this paperback - LIFE'S NOT FAIR, BUT G-D IS GOOD by Robert H. Schuller.

(Not to be cheeky, but that title would make a great tee shirt).

I opened up to this passage - page 165 'When faced with a hopeless situation'. by Joan Schabacker. She is/was (?) an educator who began a school for dyslexic children. Anyway, Schuller wrote a doctor gave her a prognosis of a terminal illness with 2-5 years to live. (As of the books 1991 printing ,she had lived seven years past that grim prognosis And she wrote this list (each entry has amplification):

'pray,resolve,ask,seek,try.....'

Has anyone read this book? Is anybody interested in this list? Thanks for reading.

Every year on my birthday, I buy myself a book (naturally). Some years, it's been luxe like an art book - Odilon Redon's BEYOND THE VISIBLE. That was a cush present, even at the Strand in NYC (one of the world's best bookstores - like there's a bad bookstore). Some years it's been thrift stores or a non-bought book, like a book found on the street or a neighbor's treasure left on the stairs for a lucky bookworm, like me.

I'm feeling philosophical and these books are speaking to me, at fifty cents apiece at the church thrift store: Harold Kushner's WHO NEEDS G-D; Dale Carnegie's HOW TO STOP WORRYING AND START LIVING; and Viktor E. Frankl's MAN'S SEARCH FOR MEANING. More deep than I thought I'd be on my birthday, but again these books are'speaking to me'. What does it mean?

Anybody read Kushner, Carnegie or Frankl? Which ones? Can you recommend any authors?

Oh yeah. I bought them all.